That Ain't the Texas I Know!

Hi y'all, Katie here. Rachel asked me to comment on Martin Berman-Gorvine's latest contribution, but I'm so mad about it I could just spit! I always tell people, "Don't you dare mess with Texas!" Whether they're from Earth, the Asteroid Belt, hell, even a Glorious Ball of Fire from Jupiter, they better smile when they say something bad about Texas around me, but it better be a close-mouthed smile, 'cause they're gonna need dental work when I get through with them!
And what could be more "messin' with Texas" than this story, set in an alternate history in which Texas was part of a shrunken United States in the early 21st century, and my home state's governor was apparently possessed of a shrunken mind but an oversized ego that made him think he could be elected President of the United States! I ask you, do you really expect me to let Martin get away with pretending, even for satirical purposes, that the good people of Texas would elect a right-wing blowhard whose sole redeeming feature is really good hair, and who is so dumb he can't even remember all his own dumb ideas in a debate? I hope you're smiling with your lips sealed, Mr. Berman-Gorvine!
This story's rating: 2 Deimoses for Pretty Dumb Story!